MAY: So it's just me and Denny today. We... (stares at Denny) ...I... have plans to bring someone new in next time. But considering today's subject, I really wasn't sure that I wanted to bring anybody else into this mess.
DENNY: (yawns)
MAY: Oh, come on. It's not that boring of a subject.
DENNY: No, it's not boring at all. I just think the whole scenario is stupid.
MAY: Be that as it may, we've all seen at least one movie or heard a story about how the nurse accidentally switched the babies so that they went to the wrong parents. Suppose the parents find out a year later. Should they try to correct the mixup?
DENNY: Yeah, see, that is where it falls apart for me. A year later? There is no way that anybody would figure it out by then. How would you find out? The hospital certainly won't tell you about that. I have a couple kids and have seen how busy those doctors and nurses are. They see a new person every day and when the baby goes home, the medical personnel forget all about them because there's somebody else to take care of. Names of patients and circumstances belong in the short-term file of your brain. Their own kids go in the long-term file.
MAY: It's a hypothetical situation.
DENNY: Hypothetical or not, there should be an attempt at realism. I mean, come on! When is a hospital ever going to think about a possible mistake that took place a year before. When would switching the kids at the bassinet rank in the Top 500 Priority List? If it gets there, you can guess the condition of that place.
MAY: Fine! Forget the hospital! The parents just realize something's up and discovers that the child is not yours. Do you try to correct the mistake?
DENNY: If I find out the child isn't mine, my first thought is not the hospital screwed up. My first thought is to find out who my wife was sleeping with. If I don't have the guts to ask her, I'm hiring a private investigator to check this out for me.
MAY: Are you really that insecure?
DENNY: Are you really that out-of-touch? What else am I supposed to think?
MAY: Maybe think about answering the stupid question?
DENNY: How ridiculous would that be, to try and find a kid from a year before? I don't even know how well the hospital keeps birth records that organized. And I seriously doubt they concern themselves with keeping the paperwork of Child A was assigned to Bed 2, and so on and so forth. I mean, what a waste of time.
MAY: You don't feel like there's any special bond to be kept with the child you yourself conceived?
DENNY: You'd love the conversation to go in that direction, wouldn't you?
MAY: It'd at least show you gave some thought to the real topic at hand.
DENNY: Maybe I'm just thinking outside the box.
MAY: Thinking outside the box is so overrated.
DENNY: Good luck swinging culture to that point-of-view.
MAY: Fine, if you're not going to be serious about this conversation, can I give my opinion?
DENNY: No need.
MAY: Excuse me?
DENNY: Yeah, there's no need. You're a psychic, aren't you? With your gift, you shouldn't ever have to end up in this situation. Am I right or am I right?
MAY: Oh, go home already.
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