There are two areas of study in court reporting school: practicing with the steno machine and expanding your vocabulary.
Now, my vocabulary is pretty strong. I was one of those nerds in high school who had a dictionary on hand whenever I came across a word I didn't know. As good as I thought I was though, I've had to realize there is plenty more I was not aware of, and this realization comes from freerice.com.
Freerice is an organization purporting to be working towards ending world hunger while educating people. In my case, I take a bunch of vocabulary tests and for every word I get correct, I "earn" five grains of rice that is then sent out to feed the hungry.
I don't know who handles all these things or how legitimate it is (although I hope it's very on the level since my teacher is the one promoting it.) I'll tell you what, though, I have learned so many words that I quickly forget and then recall later when I return to the site and see the words again. I never would have known that "sinistral" means "left-handed" without this site.
And so you're aware, vocabulary is not the only subject offered. There are math and science, and I believe history as well, included for your testing/learning pleasure.
Tuesday, August 21, 2012
Wednesday, August 15, 2012
So Two Months Later...
I'm finally back. Of sorts. I've been in school for almost a month and am doing amazingly well. Stenography is a fascinating field and one I'm surprisingly adept at. So when I'm not working or practicing, I'm trying to get focused on what used to be important to me: books and movies.
I was going to do a post on the latest superhero movies: The Amazing Spider-Man and The Dark Knight Rises, both of which I thought were excellent (I don't care what anyone says about the latest Spidey flick, that was a lot of fun.)
But I can't quite bring myself to talk about those because I just finished a story more important than either of those: Shardik by Richard Adams.
WARNING TO ALL YE WHO ENTER HERE: I spoil stories. I can't talk about them properly otherwise, not the way I want to anyways. Just a quick summary, this novel is about Kelderek, a hunter-turned-prophet for Lord Shardik, a giant bear representing the power of God to teach mankind a great lesson. Kelderek has to endure pain and humiliation before he can unlock the secret he is sure Shardik has come into the world to teach him.
NOW THE SPOILERS:
As the story begins, the giant bear saves Kelderek from a leopard and he informs the Tuginda (the high priestess of this cult) that Shardik has been reincarnated. Since this day has been foretold for centuries, the Tuginda realizes that their religious duty now is to follow the bear wherever it may go. Nothing more; just follow.
But Kelderek's people have different ideas. They've been oppressed by the Beklan Empire and now that Shardik is here, they believe this to be the sign to take Bekla for themselves. They rouse an army and go out to war immediately (I couldn't help but think of how the Jews in Christ's time expected the Messiah's purpose was to overthrow their Roman oppressors and save them from that tyranny.) The saddening part is that how Kelderek is coerced into abetting them. He takes a major role in supplanting the Tuginda's authority and imprisoning the bear for their war. Instead of following Shardik and letting its will take precedence, he imposes his own will on what the bear should do.
This leads to a point later on in the book about how blasphemous Kelderek and his people are. They do take over Bekla and Kelderek rules as emperor for five years, thus all of them take this as a sign that their war must have been God's will. This rationalization ends up being the height of their blasphemy.
This led me to think about how blasphemy is a generally misunderstood sin in our culture. Many think that it is merely the taking of God's name in vain and treating the sacred lightly. True, but there's much more to it. Blasphemy in its most odious sense is in assuming that you own God's powers and authority, that you possess all he has. This is essentially what causes Kelderek's downfall and eventual exile from his own kingdom.
I've pretty well condensed the first four-fifths of the story right there. It's a great story and well-told up until that point. The man has a gift for prose that few others are capable of or could even aspire to. Anybody who has read Watership Down or The Plague Dogs knows what I'm talking about. He writes about the most ordinary things and makes them profound. His stories feel less like words on a page but instruments in an orchestra and he is the composer putting the score together. There is music in his prose. I would read him just for the imagery and philosophy alone; that he tells a good story is merely a bonus.
Still, as good as Shardik was, I wasn't affected by what was going on. I'd seen many of the elements of this kind of story and expected a lot of what happened to happen all the way through his exile--and frankly, I wanted the exile to happen. Kelderek was a terrible ruler. Some awful crimes took place, including child slavery, while he was on the throne. Much of the evil in the kingdom if he doesn't outright condone he turns a blind eye. Frankly, what made him so bad as a ruler was that he didn't have the courage to say, "No," no matter what his conscience would tell him.
And then he gets captured by Genshed, the notorious and worst child slaver of them all. Indeed, Genshed is in for contention as the most evil villain in all literature that I've ever encountered. Certainly, he is in the Top Three.
I used to think that the Joker from The Dark Knight was as close to Satan as anybody has ever depicted. Not so. Genshed takes that spot. See, it's not enough for him to do bad things. Genshed starves the children, beats them, tortures them, mutilates them, even murders them, but that's not the worst thing he does. What makes him so terrible is that he inspires some of the children to become like him. He is known for making the children want to be like him. This is his most satanic quality: the devil doesn't have to do his own dirty work. The devil succeeds when he gets others to want to do it for him.
It's hard to read and yet, it needs to be read. In fact, for a while I thought that the Genshed section was the heart of the story. In order for Kelderek to be redeemed of his crimes, he had to suffer from the monster he let run rampant in his own kingdom. He is in the rare position of seeing all the worst consequences of his actions, a gift not many would see as a gift, but how else can we expect to change without knowing the full effect of what we've done?
And there's a happy ending of sorts: Kelderek and the children are saved. Shardik appears and dies slaying Genshed. It's a great moment. The story could have ended there. I figured the last fifty pages was just denouement.
I was wrong. The whole book is about the last chapter. I didn't see it at first. The last chapter takes place years after Shardik's passing, from the perspective of some random guy who wasn't a part of the story before and knew nothing about any of the events of the story. In fact, the point-of-view character isn't all that likeable. I didn't like him, anyways. Yet, if the Genshed section gives the story closure, the last chapter gives it meaning.
Kelderek, who left so many children to suffer, has now created a society where no child is left unwanted. He takes in all the former slaves, the neglected, the orphans, the abused, any who can make it to him, and gives them a home. In the end, he feels that this was the secret Shardik had come to share, that "when all the children are happy, then the future is secure."
In a way, I think that this story is perfect for families, especially the parents. This may sound strange, but this story has made me think about my responsibilities as a father when I get to that point and what kind of parent I want to be, as well as who I want with me for raising those children. There has not been another work of fiction that's done that to me. Very worth the time.
Shardik is Richard Adam's second novel. It might be his most important.
I was going to do a post on the latest superhero movies: The Amazing Spider-Man and The Dark Knight Rises, both of which I thought were excellent (I don't care what anyone says about the latest Spidey flick, that was a lot of fun.)
But I can't quite bring myself to talk about those because I just finished a story more important than either of those: Shardik by Richard Adams.
WARNING TO ALL YE WHO ENTER HERE: I spoil stories. I can't talk about them properly otherwise, not the way I want to anyways. Just a quick summary, this novel is about Kelderek, a hunter-turned-prophet for Lord Shardik, a giant bear representing the power of God to teach mankind a great lesson. Kelderek has to endure pain and humiliation before he can unlock the secret he is sure Shardik has come into the world to teach him.
NOW THE SPOILERS:
As the story begins, the giant bear saves Kelderek from a leopard and he informs the Tuginda (the high priestess of this cult) that Shardik has been reincarnated. Since this day has been foretold for centuries, the Tuginda realizes that their religious duty now is to follow the bear wherever it may go. Nothing more; just follow.
But Kelderek's people have different ideas. They've been oppressed by the Beklan Empire and now that Shardik is here, they believe this to be the sign to take Bekla for themselves. They rouse an army and go out to war immediately (I couldn't help but think of how the Jews in Christ's time expected the Messiah's purpose was to overthrow their Roman oppressors and save them from that tyranny.) The saddening part is that how Kelderek is coerced into abetting them. He takes a major role in supplanting the Tuginda's authority and imprisoning the bear for their war. Instead of following Shardik and letting its will take precedence, he imposes his own will on what the bear should do.
This leads to a point later on in the book about how blasphemous Kelderek and his people are. They do take over Bekla and Kelderek rules as emperor for five years, thus all of them take this as a sign that their war must have been God's will. This rationalization ends up being the height of their blasphemy.
This led me to think about how blasphemy is a generally misunderstood sin in our culture. Many think that it is merely the taking of God's name in vain and treating the sacred lightly. True, but there's much more to it. Blasphemy in its most odious sense is in assuming that you own God's powers and authority, that you possess all he has. This is essentially what causes Kelderek's downfall and eventual exile from his own kingdom.
I've pretty well condensed the first four-fifths of the story right there. It's a great story and well-told up until that point. The man has a gift for prose that few others are capable of or could even aspire to. Anybody who has read Watership Down or The Plague Dogs knows what I'm talking about. He writes about the most ordinary things and makes them profound. His stories feel less like words on a page but instruments in an orchestra and he is the composer putting the score together. There is music in his prose. I would read him just for the imagery and philosophy alone; that he tells a good story is merely a bonus.
Still, as good as Shardik was, I wasn't affected by what was going on. I'd seen many of the elements of this kind of story and expected a lot of what happened to happen all the way through his exile--and frankly, I wanted the exile to happen. Kelderek was a terrible ruler. Some awful crimes took place, including child slavery, while he was on the throne. Much of the evil in the kingdom if he doesn't outright condone he turns a blind eye. Frankly, what made him so bad as a ruler was that he didn't have the courage to say, "No," no matter what his conscience would tell him.
And then he gets captured by Genshed, the notorious and worst child slaver of them all. Indeed, Genshed is in for contention as the most evil villain in all literature that I've ever encountered. Certainly, he is in the Top Three.
I used to think that the Joker from The Dark Knight was as close to Satan as anybody has ever depicted. Not so. Genshed takes that spot. See, it's not enough for him to do bad things. Genshed starves the children, beats them, tortures them, mutilates them, even murders them, but that's not the worst thing he does. What makes him so terrible is that he inspires some of the children to become like him. He is known for making the children want to be like him. This is his most satanic quality: the devil doesn't have to do his own dirty work. The devil succeeds when he gets others to want to do it for him.
It's hard to read and yet, it needs to be read. In fact, for a while I thought that the Genshed section was the heart of the story. In order for Kelderek to be redeemed of his crimes, he had to suffer from the monster he let run rampant in his own kingdom. He is in the rare position of seeing all the worst consequences of his actions, a gift not many would see as a gift, but how else can we expect to change without knowing the full effect of what we've done?
And there's a happy ending of sorts: Kelderek and the children are saved. Shardik appears and dies slaying Genshed. It's a great moment. The story could have ended there. I figured the last fifty pages was just denouement.
I was wrong. The whole book is about the last chapter. I didn't see it at first. The last chapter takes place years after Shardik's passing, from the perspective of some random guy who wasn't a part of the story before and knew nothing about any of the events of the story. In fact, the point-of-view character isn't all that likeable. I didn't like him, anyways. Yet, if the Genshed section gives the story closure, the last chapter gives it meaning.
Kelderek, who left so many children to suffer, has now created a society where no child is left unwanted. He takes in all the former slaves, the neglected, the orphans, the abused, any who can make it to him, and gives them a home. In the end, he feels that this was the secret Shardik had come to share, that "when all the children are happy, then the future is secure."
In a way, I think that this story is perfect for families, especially the parents. This may sound strange, but this story has made me think about my responsibilities as a father when I get to that point and what kind of parent I want to be, as well as who I want with me for raising those children. There has not been another work of fiction that's done that to me. Very worth the time.
Shardik is Richard Adam's second novel. It might be his most important.
Wednesday, June 13, 2012
Great Courses and Miracle Worker
Because of the work schedule and need to focus on a mission, Latter-day Saint missionaries aren't supposed to watch television, or go to the movies, or to read material that doesn't belong to the mission library (scriptures and a few other religious works.) The first two were not a struggle to give up when I went but the last one was. But since I knew about it well in advance, I decided to give myself a little reward before I went to serve: as soon as I came home, I was going to read all five of Orson Scott Card's Homecoming novels, mostly because I really like Card's work and this was one series I hadn't gotten to.
I still haven't read the Homecoming series. In fact, I haven't read any of Card's fiction since coming home. I don't really know why; it's just that whenever I start thinking about Card, I find another book in front of me and his fiction keeps getting put to the side.
Nevertheless, I am thoroughly hooked on his weekly column, Uncle Orson Reviews Everything (and he does review everything.) He's funny, he's informative, I appreciate his candor, and even on the few occasions that I disagree with him, I'm satisfied with the reasons why he sees things the way he does.
One of the best parts of his column is on the subject of education. Some time ago, he mentioned The Great Courses, which sounded really cool and I had to check it out. Went to the website and gasped. The prices were incredible, which is fair. These are college-level courses and college is expensive, but here, you're not getting a degree. Still, education is education and assuming that I have a steady job, these would be worth the money.
Fortunately, I have a nice compromise. Turns out my local library has a few of The Great Courses to borrow. This is exciting and terrifying. I mean, if one DVD gets scratched, I owe them for the whole thing. But I'm responsible and don't worry too much on that: I can't believe the free knowledge I'm getting from this! My first course I took was on Philosophy and the Natural Rights of Man. I didn't get to finish it because I was running out of time (these are long courses.) I could have renewed but I found one that was even more exciting to me: 12 hours worth of lecture on the Old Testament from their Religion section.
This is just my taste. They have courses in all subjects from Math to History. I recommend checking them out if you can. It's great stuff.
***
I've seen a made-for-TV version of The Miracle Worker before and the story of Helen Keller continues to fascinate me after all these years. The story is not really about her life but the small portion of childhood where Anne Sullivan helped Helen discover how to communicate and join civilization.
I just saw the 1962 black-and-white version, starring Anne Bankcroft and Patty Duke, and it wrapped me in from start-to-finish. This is the best version I've seen so far. The story is still the same as it was from the other film I saw, and since it's based on a play, I can't imagine that anybody would stray too far from the material.
What made this one a winner for me was the near ten-minute fight Sullivan has getting Helen to eat her lunch right. There is almost no talking at all during the sequence; both actresses held the screen by their mere presence on screen. It was by far the most dramatic scene for me since it was the first time anybody actually tried to parent her; her parents clearly couldn't handle disciplining the brat and Sullivan refused to let her behave like an animal but as a little lady.
Oh, and it makes me laugh. Helen spitting food in Sullivan's face only for Sullivan to splash water all over her. That was the best moment of all. That is one of the best statements of the parent-child relationship that I've ever seen.
I still haven't read the Homecoming series. In fact, I haven't read any of Card's fiction since coming home. I don't really know why; it's just that whenever I start thinking about Card, I find another book in front of me and his fiction keeps getting put to the side.
Nevertheless, I am thoroughly hooked on his weekly column, Uncle Orson Reviews Everything (and he does review everything.) He's funny, he's informative, I appreciate his candor, and even on the few occasions that I disagree with him, I'm satisfied with the reasons why he sees things the way he does.
One of the best parts of his column is on the subject of education. Some time ago, he mentioned The Great Courses, which sounded really cool and I had to check it out. Went to the website and gasped. The prices were incredible, which is fair. These are college-level courses and college is expensive, but here, you're not getting a degree. Still, education is education and assuming that I have a steady job, these would be worth the money.
Fortunately, I have a nice compromise. Turns out my local library has a few of The Great Courses to borrow. This is exciting and terrifying. I mean, if one DVD gets scratched, I owe them for the whole thing. But I'm responsible and don't worry too much on that: I can't believe the free knowledge I'm getting from this! My first course I took was on Philosophy and the Natural Rights of Man. I didn't get to finish it because I was running out of time (these are long courses.) I could have renewed but I found one that was even more exciting to me: 12 hours worth of lecture on the Old Testament from their Religion section.
This is just my taste. They have courses in all subjects from Math to History. I recommend checking them out if you can. It's great stuff.
***
I've seen a made-for-TV version of The Miracle Worker before and the story of Helen Keller continues to fascinate me after all these years. The story is not really about her life but the small portion of childhood where Anne Sullivan helped Helen discover how to communicate and join civilization.
I just saw the 1962 black-and-white version, starring Anne Bankcroft and Patty Duke, and it wrapped me in from start-to-finish. This is the best version I've seen so far. The story is still the same as it was from the other film I saw, and since it's based on a play, I can't imagine that anybody would stray too far from the material.
What made this one a winner for me was the near ten-minute fight Sullivan has getting Helen to eat her lunch right. There is almost no talking at all during the sequence; both actresses held the screen by their mere presence on screen. It was by far the most dramatic scene for me since it was the first time anybody actually tried to parent her; her parents clearly couldn't handle disciplining the brat and Sullivan refused to let her behave like an animal but as a little lady.
Oh, and it makes me laugh. Helen spitting food in Sullivan's face only for Sullivan to splash water all over her. That was the best moment of all. That is one of the best statements of the parent-child relationship that I've ever seen.
Friday, June 8, 2012
Trust Your Eyes
There is an unexpected perk to working at Barnes & Noble, one that I take great pleasure in. Once a week, at least, a couple copies of books will be lying on the breakroom tables that are free for employees to take, at a first-come, first-served basis. Advanced copies.
Now, most of these books hold no interest for me. Often, they're some lame romance (not knocking the romance genre, understand, but the books themselves look lame) or they're some boring modernist affair that I will never remember. I'm happy to leave those for somebody else.
Once in a while, though, a jewel shows up. Trust Your Eyes by Linwood Barclay is a thriller coming out in September (and I got to read it before all of you!)
This is not your typical thriller. Not a whole lot of gunplay that goes on here. In fact, this is really two separate stories that happen to collide towards the end.
The first story is a low-key family drama about two brothers, Ray and Thomas Kilbride. Their father has just died in a lawnmower accident and Ray has moved in with his brother temporarily to help take care of things. Thomas needs the help, too, because he has schizophrenic and obsessive tendencies, the latter being shown by his map obsession. He spends all day, every day, on his computer playing around with his Whirl360, a computer program with pictures of every street across the world. Thomas memorizes everything that is on there, every street, every store, building, all in the "service of the CIA" for when "all the computers in the world shut down and they lose all virtual maps." Naturally, Ray is out of his league trying to help his brother behave like a normal human being, or at least a functional one, and easing him off his paranoid delusions.
At the same time, Ray is noticing some odd circumstances regarding his father's accident and is wondering whether it was really so accidental.
The other story is a murder conspiracy that goes wrong. Allison Fitch, a bartender months behind on all her bills, sees something interesting about an upcoming governor election and realizes that blackmail is a lovely way to settle her debts. Which seems to go well until the folks she's blackmailing decide to put a hit on her. It all goes crazy from there.
I don't want to reveal too much else about that story because it thrives on surprise. I had a lot of fun seeing what would happen next.
These two separate tales do collide when Thomas, on his Whirl360 tour, sees a disturbing image linked to the conspirators. Down to the last page, I found this book hard to put down.
It's a fun read. I'll happily recommend it.
Now, most of these books hold no interest for me. Often, they're some lame romance (not knocking the romance genre, understand, but the books themselves look lame) or they're some boring modernist affair that I will never remember. I'm happy to leave those for somebody else.
Once in a while, though, a jewel shows up. Trust Your Eyes by Linwood Barclay is a thriller coming out in September (and I got to read it before all of you!)
This is not your typical thriller. Not a whole lot of gunplay that goes on here. In fact, this is really two separate stories that happen to collide towards the end.
The first story is a low-key family drama about two brothers, Ray and Thomas Kilbride. Their father has just died in a lawnmower accident and Ray has moved in with his brother temporarily to help take care of things. Thomas needs the help, too, because he has schizophrenic and obsessive tendencies, the latter being shown by his map obsession. He spends all day, every day, on his computer playing around with his Whirl360, a computer program with pictures of every street across the world. Thomas memorizes everything that is on there, every street, every store, building, all in the "service of the CIA" for when "all the computers in the world shut down and they lose all virtual maps." Naturally, Ray is out of his league trying to help his brother behave like a normal human being, or at least a functional one, and easing him off his paranoid delusions.
At the same time, Ray is noticing some odd circumstances regarding his father's accident and is wondering whether it was really so accidental.
The other story is a murder conspiracy that goes wrong. Allison Fitch, a bartender months behind on all her bills, sees something interesting about an upcoming governor election and realizes that blackmail is a lovely way to settle her debts. Which seems to go well until the folks she's blackmailing decide to put a hit on her. It all goes crazy from there.
I don't want to reveal too much else about that story because it thrives on surprise. I had a lot of fun seeing what would happen next.
These two separate tales do collide when Thomas, on his Whirl360 tour, sees a disturbing image linked to the conspirators. Down to the last page, I found this book hard to put down.
It's a fun read. I'll happily recommend it.
Friday, June 1, 2012
May 2012
This has been a fun month for me as far as books go. It's also an indication of how little I've accomplished socially and in any other format of failure in life that I have achieved. But no regrets!
Nonfiction: Bhagavad Gita (note: this was fascinating. I've made the comment before that you can't understand a religion until you've read their scripture. This is the main reason I read the Koran several years back. While this is not the only scripture I know of, it certainly has made aspects of Hinduism clearer than it ever would have been had I never looked through it.)
Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain; The Book of Questions by Gregory Stock, PhD; The Prince by Machiavelli; Marry Him: The Case for Settling for Mr. Good Enough by Lori Gottlieb; The World According to Fred Rogers; The Social Contract by Jean Jacques Rousseau
Graphic Novels: Anya's Ghost by Vera Brosgol; Naruto: Vol. 56 by Masashi Kishimoto
Fiction: The Five People You Meet in Heaven by Mitch Albom; The Wastelands, Wizard and Glass, and Wolves of the Calla by Stephen King; Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut
Nonfiction: Bhagavad Gita (note: this was fascinating. I've made the comment before that you can't understand a religion until you've read their scripture. This is the main reason I read the Koran several years back. While this is not the only scripture I know of, it certainly has made aspects of Hinduism clearer than it ever would have been had I never looked through it.)
Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain; The Book of Questions by Gregory Stock, PhD; The Prince by Machiavelli; Marry Him: The Case for Settling for Mr. Good Enough by Lori Gottlieb; The World According to Fred Rogers; The Social Contract by Jean Jacques Rousseau
Graphic Novels: Anya's Ghost by Vera Brosgol; Naruto: Vol. 56 by Masashi Kishimoto
Fiction: The Five People You Meet in Heaven by Mitch Albom; The Wastelands, Wizard and Glass, and Wolves of the Calla by Stephen King; Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
Conversation 6: Babies
MAY: So it's just me and Denny today. We... (stares at Denny) ...I... have plans to bring someone new in next time. But considering today's subject, I really wasn't sure that I wanted to bring anybody else into this mess.
DENNY: (yawns)
MAY: Oh, come on. It's not that boring of a subject.
DENNY: No, it's not boring at all. I just think the whole scenario is stupid.
MAY: Be that as it may, we've all seen at least one movie or heard a story about how the nurse accidentally switched the babies so that they went to the wrong parents. Suppose the parents find out a year later. Should they try to correct the mixup?
DENNY: Yeah, see, that is where it falls apart for me. A year later? There is no way that anybody would figure it out by then. How would you find out? The hospital certainly won't tell you about that. I have a couple kids and have seen how busy those doctors and nurses are. They see a new person every day and when the baby goes home, the medical personnel forget all about them because there's somebody else to take care of. Names of patients and circumstances belong in the short-term file of your brain. Their own kids go in the long-term file.
MAY: It's a hypothetical situation.
DENNY: Hypothetical or not, there should be an attempt at realism. I mean, come on! When is a hospital ever going to think about a possible mistake that took place a year before. When would switching the kids at the bassinet rank in the Top 500 Priority List? If it gets there, you can guess the condition of that place.
MAY: Fine! Forget the hospital! The parents just realize something's up and discovers that the child is not yours. Do you try to correct the mistake?
DENNY: If I find out the child isn't mine, my first thought is not the hospital screwed up. My first thought is to find out who my wife was sleeping with. If I don't have the guts to ask her, I'm hiring a private investigator to check this out for me.
MAY: Are you really that insecure?
DENNY: Are you really that out-of-touch? What else am I supposed to think?
MAY: Maybe think about answering the stupid question?
DENNY: How ridiculous would that be, to try and find a kid from a year before? I don't even know how well the hospital keeps birth records that organized. And I seriously doubt they concern themselves with keeping the paperwork of Child A was assigned to Bed 2, and so on and so forth. I mean, what a waste of time.
MAY: You don't feel like there's any special bond to be kept with the child you yourself conceived?
DENNY: You'd love the conversation to go in that direction, wouldn't you?
MAY: It'd at least show you gave some thought to the real topic at hand.
DENNY: Maybe I'm just thinking outside the box.
MAY: Thinking outside the box is so overrated.
DENNY: Good luck swinging culture to that point-of-view.
MAY: Fine, if you're not going to be serious about this conversation, can I give my opinion?
DENNY: No need.
MAY: Excuse me?
DENNY: Yeah, there's no need. You're a psychic, aren't you? With your gift, you shouldn't ever have to end up in this situation. Am I right or am I right?
MAY: Oh, go home already.
DENNY: (yawns)
MAY: Oh, come on. It's not that boring of a subject.
DENNY: No, it's not boring at all. I just think the whole scenario is stupid.
MAY: Be that as it may, we've all seen at least one movie or heard a story about how the nurse accidentally switched the babies so that they went to the wrong parents. Suppose the parents find out a year later. Should they try to correct the mixup?
DENNY: Yeah, see, that is where it falls apart for me. A year later? There is no way that anybody would figure it out by then. How would you find out? The hospital certainly won't tell you about that. I have a couple kids and have seen how busy those doctors and nurses are. They see a new person every day and when the baby goes home, the medical personnel forget all about them because there's somebody else to take care of. Names of patients and circumstances belong in the short-term file of your brain. Their own kids go in the long-term file.
MAY: It's a hypothetical situation.
DENNY: Hypothetical or not, there should be an attempt at realism. I mean, come on! When is a hospital ever going to think about a possible mistake that took place a year before. When would switching the kids at the bassinet rank in the Top 500 Priority List? If it gets there, you can guess the condition of that place.
MAY: Fine! Forget the hospital! The parents just realize something's up and discovers that the child is not yours. Do you try to correct the mistake?
DENNY: If I find out the child isn't mine, my first thought is not the hospital screwed up. My first thought is to find out who my wife was sleeping with. If I don't have the guts to ask her, I'm hiring a private investigator to check this out for me.
MAY: Are you really that insecure?
DENNY: Are you really that out-of-touch? What else am I supposed to think?
MAY: Maybe think about answering the stupid question?
DENNY: How ridiculous would that be, to try and find a kid from a year before? I don't even know how well the hospital keeps birth records that organized. And I seriously doubt they concern themselves with keeping the paperwork of Child A was assigned to Bed 2, and so on and so forth. I mean, what a waste of time.
MAY: You don't feel like there's any special bond to be kept with the child you yourself conceived?
DENNY: You'd love the conversation to go in that direction, wouldn't you?
MAY: It'd at least show you gave some thought to the real topic at hand.
DENNY: Maybe I'm just thinking outside the box.
MAY: Thinking outside the box is so overrated.
DENNY: Good luck swinging culture to that point-of-view.
MAY: Fine, if you're not going to be serious about this conversation, can I give my opinion?
DENNY: No need.
MAY: Excuse me?
DENNY: Yeah, there's no need. You're a psychic, aren't you? With your gift, you shouldn't ever have to end up in this situation. Am I right or am I right?
MAY: Oh, go home already.
Friday, May 25, 2012
Fred Rogers
Once upon a time, there was a man named Tony. Tony was a good man with an all too-kind disposition in a very not-kind world but refused to let that get him down. He had a great job as a public speaker (he literally traveled the world getting paid to talk to people) and the subject of many of his talks was about happiness. The thing that made him most happy was his family: good marriage and six kids (he's one of those kind of crazy people.)
He was out in the mid-West one day several years back (probably another of his speaking tours) and stopped in a restaurant in-between places. He had just finished his meal when he saw a familiar face. As the waitress came around, he said, "Is that Mr. Rogers?"
The waitress smiled and said, "Yes, he comes here pretty regular. He's a good friend of mine."
"You know, he did a lot of good for my kids with his television programming. Could you tell him 'thank you' for me?"
"Why don't you go over and tell him yourself?"
"Oh, I don't bother him. I'm sure he gets sick of random people like me showing up."
"No! He loves it."
After some hemming and hawing and her prodding him to get a move-on, Tony finally got up and walked to Mr. Rogers table. He did what he said he'd do: offer to shake his hand and say "thank you" for having a program that helped all his children while growing up.
Mr. Rogers smiled and asked about all six of his kids. Tony started to give a list of the names but Mr. Rogers stopped him. He grabbed a napkin and a pen and said, "Write their names down for me here." Tony complied and as soon as all six names were written, Mr. Rogers began asking about each kid, starting from the top. For several minutes, Tony answered every question about his kid and towards the end, Mr. Rogers said, "You're a great dad."
Tony was a bit stunned but he was also aware of what Mr. Rogers was doing. After all, hadn't Tony been doing public relations for a living? Mr. Rogers had asked the questions and controlled the conversation, so all they had been talking about was Tony. Tony tried to take control and asked Mr. Rogers about himself. "What brings this way?"
"I have a friend in Native American relations and he was going to show me something neat," (I paraphrase). "What brings you this way?"
And there Tony went, talking about himself with Mr. Rogers interrupting again with the same compliment as before. By the time they finished talking, Tony walked out to his car singing "It's a Beautiful Day In the Neighborhood."
***
This is a true story, by the way. I heard it almost two years ago from Tony, who I greatly respected. Now Tony is the friendliest man I've ever met and when he shared this experience, he said that Mr. Rogers was the friendliest man in the world. Indeed, Tony gave the impression that he wanted to be Mr. Rogers when he grew up.
It's been years since I watched any of his shows. I think the last time I did, I was ten. I don't believe PBS broadcasts any episodes anymore, so I'm out of luck altogether when I finally grow up and have a family, too.
What brought this up? I found a small book the other day, The World According to Fred Rogers, which is full of quotes from Mr. Rogers, regarding the most important things he ever said or did. It took me an hour to read and days to ponder over what was in there.
Since this was also a posthumous collection, there was also a sweet foreward from his widow and a biography in the back. Anyways, I highly recommend reading it and sharing it with your friends. It's a shame that the rising generation may forget what an influence he had over us, not just from his show that went throughout the world but also each soul he touched individually on the daily course of his life. Character is shown by how you conduct yourself one-on-one, not just in front of a group, and the story that I just told and was told to me is my proof that Mr. Rogers character was strong indeed.
He was out in the mid-West one day several years back (probably another of his speaking tours) and stopped in a restaurant in-between places. He had just finished his meal when he saw a familiar face. As the waitress came around, he said, "Is that Mr. Rogers?"
The waitress smiled and said, "Yes, he comes here pretty regular. He's a good friend of mine."
"You know, he did a lot of good for my kids with his television programming. Could you tell him 'thank you' for me?"
"Why don't you go over and tell him yourself?"
"Oh, I don't bother him. I'm sure he gets sick of random people like me showing up."
"No! He loves it."
After some hemming and hawing and her prodding him to get a move-on, Tony finally got up and walked to Mr. Rogers table. He did what he said he'd do: offer to shake his hand and say "thank you" for having a program that helped all his children while growing up.
Mr. Rogers smiled and asked about all six of his kids. Tony started to give a list of the names but Mr. Rogers stopped him. He grabbed a napkin and a pen and said, "Write their names down for me here." Tony complied and as soon as all six names were written, Mr. Rogers began asking about each kid, starting from the top. For several minutes, Tony answered every question about his kid and towards the end, Mr. Rogers said, "You're a great dad."
Tony was a bit stunned but he was also aware of what Mr. Rogers was doing. After all, hadn't Tony been doing public relations for a living? Mr. Rogers had asked the questions and controlled the conversation, so all they had been talking about was Tony. Tony tried to take control and asked Mr. Rogers about himself. "What brings this way?"
"I have a friend in Native American relations and he was going to show me something neat," (I paraphrase). "What brings you this way?"
And there Tony went, talking about himself with Mr. Rogers interrupting again with the same compliment as before. By the time they finished talking, Tony walked out to his car singing "It's a Beautiful Day In the Neighborhood."
***
This is a true story, by the way. I heard it almost two years ago from Tony, who I greatly respected. Now Tony is the friendliest man I've ever met and when he shared this experience, he said that Mr. Rogers was the friendliest man in the world. Indeed, Tony gave the impression that he wanted to be Mr. Rogers when he grew up.
It's been years since I watched any of his shows. I think the last time I did, I was ten. I don't believe PBS broadcasts any episodes anymore, so I'm out of luck altogether when I finally grow up and have a family, too.
What brought this up? I found a small book the other day, The World According to Fred Rogers, which is full of quotes from Mr. Rogers, regarding the most important things he ever said or did. It took me an hour to read and days to ponder over what was in there.
Since this was also a posthumous collection, there was also a sweet foreward from his widow and a biography in the back. Anyways, I highly recommend reading it and sharing it with your friends. It's a shame that the rising generation may forget what an influence he had over us, not just from his show that went throughout the world but also each soul he touched individually on the daily course of his life. Character is shown by how you conduct yourself one-on-one, not just in front of a group, and the story that I just told and was told to me is my proof that Mr. Rogers character was strong indeed.
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